


Hold Me

by yesterdaisy_______57



Category: Fantastic Beasts and Where to Find Them (Movies), Harry Potter - J. K. Rowling
Genre: Bittersweet, M/M
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2019-03-01
Updated: 2019-03-01
Packaged: 2019-11-07 13:21:36
Rating: General Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 1,280
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/17961338
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/yesterdaisy_______57/pseuds/yesterdaisy_______57
Summary: At the end of Fantastic Beasts and Where to Find Them, as Newt forces him back into his own body, Grindelwald recalls the night before he and Albus parted.





	Hold Me

Gellert crumples from behind, struggling to straighten but failing. His knees are searing from where they struck the hard stone; his breath comes in pants. He looks round to see Mr Scamander focused intently on him in that strange, gentle way that Albus must have loved -- mind whirring as he puts the pieces together. As Newt’s lips move to form the spell, Gellert turns his head back to his own lap.

He smiles in spite of himself. There is no need to worry. He will give them a bit of a shock, watch their eyes widen and the hasty poker faces wiggle across their features. Let them try to best him.

The transition is beginning: he can feel the beginnings of it at the top of his forehead, a pleasant shivering sensation like that of stepping from ice into hot water. The spell had been smoothly performed, quiet and shrewd despite the tension of the moment. His throat tightens slightly; he refuses to admit that he can see why Albus has such a fondness for this wizard. It is very trying how that man can get under Gellert’s skin from such a distance. He doesn’t even have to try.

Sometimes Gellert thinks they know each other too well.

Of course, he knows Albus’ insecurities just as well. Gellert has seen Albus Dumbledore at his most vulnerable; and he has sometimes even been there for him, the tonic he needed -- craved -- in his small and limiting world back at home.

\---

It had been the night before his sister died, but Albus didn’t know it yet. Neither did Gellert, not exactly, but he had a terrible sense for things to come sometimes and in the past few days he’d been subtly pulling away from Albus. Albus was always perceptive, particularly when it came to Gellert: of course he had noticed.

He was sitting on his bed when Gellert pushed open the door, one long leg stretching down to the floor and the other folded in towards him; his knee was obscured by the long, dark red hair that fell forwards over his shoulder. His wand lay abandoned a few feet away and he was playing with his wrist, bending it this way and that in benign, curious examination. Several books lay open in various places, like he’d stayed in all day; but he was lacking the usual energy of being cooped up. There was something very sad in his figure tonight. Sometimes Albus seemed decades older, like he had carried the weight on his shoulders for so long that teenage-dom had simply melted away.

He glanced up at Gellert’s arrival and his eyes lit up for a moment. Gellert grinned without meaning to; he came further into the room and paused, then turned back to close the door and hesitated. Just outside Albus’ room, there was a beautiful portrait of his younger sister mounted on the wall. She was sitting perfectly still and nearly everything in the painting suggested a peaceful happiness; yet those dark eyes surveyed Gellert with unsettling anguish. For a moment his vision swam and he could just hear that terrible echo, something he couldn’t put his finger on. Flashes. Gellert shut the door quickly and turned around, trying to clear his mind and wipe his face of any lingering emotion.

‘You haven’t noticed, perhaps, but it has nevertheless gotten dark outside,’ he blurted, drawing his wand and striding towards the candle on the wall. He fumbled with the nonverbal spell the first time and swore under his breath.  _ Steady. _ The second time a wild fist of fire surged from his wand and managed to collide and light the magical wick. Light filled the room warmly.

Gellert turned; Albus was watching him silently, still on the bed. ‘Gellert,’ he said sadly, ‘don’t insult both our intelligences.’

Gellert started to come towards him, opening his mouth, but Albus cut him off: ‘You know better than I what is happening inside your head.  Forgive me for saying it, but impressive though you may otherwise be, your skills in the theatrical arts include some rather…  _ egregious _ faults.’

‘There was nothing--’

‘I’d rather hoped you would not resort to lying to  _ me _ , Gellert,’ said Albus with some regret. His tone had not yet been unkind; however, he continued more gravely. ‘Whatever it is that makes you so reluctant to say,’ he went on, ‘I wish you would tell me. I believe it could help us both.’

Gellert stared at him; Albus looked back, meeting his gaze calmly. Finally Gellert dropped to a knee in front of him. ‘ _ Why? _ ’ he pressed.

‘Thank you,’ said Albus gently. ‘Because I know you are no coward, Gellert, but your attempts to hide what lies ahead are not the work of bravery but of foolishness. You are letting this gift control you, rather than the other way around.’

Gellert said nothing. His heart was beating rather fast and he was having trouble thinking straight with all the impulses in his brain; to make it all the more difficult, Albus’ bright blue eyes had not left his and a bittersweet warmth was bursting through his chest as he noticed the slight widening, raised eyebrows as if in awe -- or challenge? -- which always came to Albus’ face when he had maintained eye contact with Gellert for long enough; and yet those shrewd words were making his stomach churn uncomfortably and he didn’t want to admit if he was scared.

Abruptly Albus cleared his throat and looked away, and when Gellert looked back up at him again he could see that in fact Albus was nearly as frightened as he was; but rather than making him look weaker it seemed to bring to him an odd intensity, and the sadness Gellert had seen before was suddenly, vibrantly apparent. There was fire in his eyes.

‘I don’t know what it is, Albus,’ Gellert said all at once, ‘just...  _ terrible _ . I'm sorry.’

Albus nodded silently, watching him with that intensity, that fire in his eyes. They held the silence together until Albus broke it.

‘Do you think you can hold me?’ he asked Gellert quietly.

Gellert had risen slowly to his feet again, turned and sit on the edge of the bed; and they had looked at each other for a moment before Gellert took Albus in his arms and felt him relax into the embrace. They had stayed there, wordless, for so long that they had fallen asleep. It was the last thing either of them would say to each other before the beginning of the end the next day, when something already had broken between them.

They were still in each other’s arms when Aberforth burst into the room the next morning and startled them awake.

\---

Yes, Gellert knows Albus Dumbledore very well. It will be a very good tool someday.

As he feels Newt’s spell run through the rest of his body settle everything familiarly back in place, he raises his head and looks up at the President unwaveringly.

He is aware of many eyes on him; the room is silent. He lets the moment ring, for he has not been so sure in a long time that so many people were hanging on his every word. When he speaks it will not have to be in that godforsaken American accent he has been practicing, though it will be in English. Gellert raises his eyebrows.

‘Do you think you can hold me?’ he whispers.

The President is not altogether an ignorant witch. She will be all the more dangerous now for the wounded pride of her own deception. Her head nods.

‘We’ll do our best,’ she says quietly. ‘Mr Grindelwald.’

**Author's Note:**

> I tend to stick with a certain fandom but I certainly went out of it for this story! This wasn’t anything I intended to write but I had the idea and then it came very quickly once I started writing, so it was quite spur-of-the-moment. Hope you enjoyed.  
> If you also read other things I write, I would recommend spacing this out because the moods of these last three are rather similar and I think they work best on their own.  
> I appreciate comments!


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